I'm sorry, I know I was stupid!

Hello followers! I'm quite chuffed, I've got my first follower of my blog! Hi Jess! Ok, ok, she is a friend of mine from way back, and I did encourage her to come and have a read, but its still nice all the same!

Ok, lets get to the nitty gritty of things. Yup, I went and weighed myself a few weeks ago like my last blog entry said I would - but I didn't post it - why? Well, stupidly, I was cross at what the scales said, so I ignored it. I was hoping, give it a week or two, and somehow, as if by magic, I'd have a result I didn't mind so much..... NO of course not. So, I apologise now for being so bloody stupid. But the whole thing is getting me fed up - Each time I think about the fact I want to be slimmer, I think of a phrase I once read...
"The definition of stupidity - continuing in the same way, expecting different results" 
and at the moment, that is me. Well no, I'm not going to do myself quite such an injustice as to not acknowledge what I have been doing more of. What I decided is to not rush into things quite so much, that way failure does lie, so, what I have been doing more of, is gradually easing myself into more exercice. My daily aim is to do at least 30 mins walk, or something cardiovascular, some arm workouts using weights (or in my case, 2 tins of spaghetti hoops), 150 crunches with the thigh master and one, if not 2 sessions with my slendertone belt. now, I know what your thinking with the last one - that it's a fools erand. Well, I'm not actually using it for the intention of getting a flat tummy (but it would be nice!) no, actually, when I was good before and made use of it on a daily basis, I found that it improved my back and I didn't hurt so much. Which is great for many reasons. It will obviously make me less resistant to exercising because I hurt less, I'll take less painkillers and anti-inflamatory tablets (better for my liver) and so overall it will lift my mood because I feel better! So, no, don't poo-poo an idea unless you know the reasons why!

Anyway, that's what I have been doing towards my weight goal, but, as it's now a week and a bit to go before Xmas, I have decided to not fret too much about what I eat over the season, but I will keep up with my exercising as best as I can. The reason I say as best as I can, is because I'm going to have my wrist operation on my right hand next week - 2 days before Christmas I'll be going under the knife for my carpal tunnel thing.

So, here is my poorly litte wrist that in 8 days time from now will be horribly mutilated! My surgeon,  Mr Teckwale (or how ever you spell his name) said I will have a cut from just under the middle part of the centre of my palm, down towards my wrist - ghagahh I'm not exacty looking forward to it! But, for ages now I have suffered pins and needles almost all the time - I can't hold up my mobile phone to my ear for long before it hurts too much. Doing most things with my hands hurts alot. In the long run, it's better to do something about it now rather than later. But I'm really scared. Not about the procedure, but more about the keyloid scarring I will have afterwards. God they're itchy buggers and I have to take care not to further mutilate myself with the itchyness. It's going to be so humiliating over Christmas, I won't be able to do much for 4/5 days after the operation, so I'm going to have to get J to cut my Christmas dinner up for me! How embarressing! Never mind, I'm sure it'll all be ok.

Now that I have finally found my camera battery charger, I thought you might like to see a piccy or two of my new little cat Lily - she's such a pain in the arse, but hopefully, her cuteness will keep seeing her through! What do you think?........

 What do you think? Yep, she is adorable, yep, she is a nice cat who meows when you leave her, and greets you at the door. Often, she will sleep in the chair next to the bed and be nice and peaceful. But, she is a kitten, and is doing annoying kitten things. To be honest, I wouldn't be bothered about most of the stuff she does if it wasn't for J. I keep feeling like she's here on a "we'll see how it goes" basis, and I feel like she's not really mine, because in all honestly, J still doesn't want a cat, even tho he was so giving & pleasant when he said "if I don't say yes, you'll never shut up about having a cat". I keep thinking that I have to make her be on her best, prim & proper behvaiour so she doesn't upset J. God, I wish I knew how to relax and not get so uptight about everyone and everything else!

Workwise, still looking for a proper job, but I am now temping! And what is really nice is even tho I'm "only" a temp, I was still invited to their Christmas dinner at the Imperial! That was so nice of them. I had steak, MMMMMmmmm! I'll be wanting that again!